Hindustan and Studying

Dear readers (if any),

I realised that I have not been writing for such a long time. My last post was in March 2014. That's 7 months ago. For the past 7 months, my studying life has been hectic. Got into LLB last March and since then I have been busy with chasing deadlines and meeting dues. That is the nature of what I do now. Honestly, I have no idea what I am doing but I know I have to make everything right and that my marks depend on others and others are depending on me. So, don't screw up.

Enough about my studies.

The reason for my post today is actually to show the rationale of watching Hindustan movies while studying. People have been asking me how do I study although I am no one in terms of studies or academics. I am not the smartest person in class what more in my batch. I am probably one of the lowest in my class. Anyhow, that does not matter. Regardless, people have talked to me about my study method. They asked me how did I study back at home because I am the type of person who cannot study in a group. I study alone and that's how I've been surviving law school while others are used to studying in groups.

I have found a way to study last year which has been working quite well for me. Although that did not help me in my results, at least I improved in the way I study. I understand that some might not be of the same understanding on this method but oh well, everyone has their own way. It is to be noted however, that this method has its own pros and cons and I am the victim of both.

I am the type of person where I cannot stay at a place for such a long time. I cannot stay studying for more that one hour. I am easily distracted by my surroundings. I am easily tempted by what's in front of me no matter whether I study at home or outside. I do not like to just sit for hours and study studiously. I do not like that. In fact, I cannot have myself stay any longer than 45 minutes. How do I control this then?

Nowadays, the way I study is by watching Hindustan movies. How it is done and what is the rationale?

Well, it is a known fact that hindustan/bollywood movies run for 3 hours at least. So, I switch on a movie, old ones though. I don't like the new bollywood movies. For me, they have lost touch of the true bollywood spirit. Anyhow, that does not matter now. I switch on a bollywood movie and I will start studying while the show is running. I will try my best to not get up from my seat up and until the movie has ended. Why? Because this can ensure that I am studying at least 50% of the time I'm sitting down at my study table. As I said, I am easily distracted. I cannot deny the fact that I will get distracted by the movie. I will watch the movie instead of studying. But, that does not matter. Why? This is because I cannot stand looking at my notes for more than an hour STRAIGHT. So, that's my reliever. I read, watch movie then continue reading for THREE HOURS.

Comparing this to previous years, I will not even sit for more than an hour. In that one hour, I will only read my notes for like 30 minutes. So, there's a huge different in hours of me studying.

Previously, I sit down for one hour, study for 30 minutes
Now, I sit for three hours, study for at least one hour thirty minutes.
That's an hour more than previous years.
Good, right?

Well then, that is my rationale in putting on hindustan movies while I study. But, please be careful. As a result of this, I can understand a little bit of hindustan language. So, that might happen to you too. Everyone has their own way of studying. So, figure out the best for you.

Love,
MARL!

Travelling; Passion, Hobby or Interest?

Travel
Nowadays, people  travel more compared to before. Take for an example, in 1990s, people are not exposed to travelling that much compared to now. Not to say that people do not travel at all before but less than the numbers now.

People travel more because of one reason, travelling is easier nowadays. Although it might be more expensive than before, it is still easier than before. It is more  accessible. More flights going into more countries, more places.

More and more interesting places being discovered through time. Hidden, beautiful islands are being discovered day by day.

More blogs on travel.

If you look at the above, its basically icons of those particular states.

1. France
2. UK
3. US
4. Japan
5. UAE
6. Hong Kong

This is also MY OWN TO DO LIST.

With God's blessings, I have managed to go to 2 places in the list and one, with his will, I will be able to set my foot there too.

Travel is my passion. I love travelling.

One thing that is always holding me back, other than finance, is time. Time has always been the barrier and that it is non  negotiable.

Hope I get to be a traveller, one day.

Love,
Marl

In the Light of Love

Few months had passed
That feeling went away and I thought it'll never come back
It didn't for a while
Which made me happy thinking that I could forget about everything

The feeling really wasn't there anymore
I felt free
But was I happy?
Well, yes!

Feeling of Love never really had an impact on me
It came then it went away
Its like a crush on someone with butterflies in your stomach
It came and it went away

Few months after
Didn't know what had happened
That feeling sparked back
Where did that come from?

That thoughts wander around my mind
No idea where it came back from
No idea where it got lost

But right now it seems too late
Since you want someone - else
It hurts everytime I said 'Go get her'
It hurts everytime I had to fake a smile or a laugh

I know I have to be the bigger person
If it happens, it happens
Even the happiest couple could break up, what more two persons with no ties whatsoever
Even the people who hate the other most could end up marrying each other,
what more people who knew each other.

Its all up to The Almighty
I pass this matter to you, God.

Love,
Marl

One Year Later

Good day,

I realised that my last post was one year ago, 27th January 2013. Here I am now, early in the morning on a Sunday suddenly feels like writing again. The feeling of writing suddenly kicks in again and I am happy that it happened. Just because I have not been writing for so long and I have been keeping all my emotions in last year to myself most of the time. I need to get it out sooner or later.

2013 has been a great year for me. In fact, I think it is the best year in my 23 years of life and I am not even kidding. Many exciting things happened and many of them were unexpected. Alot of great memories and experiences along the way. In short these were among the things that happened to me in 2013.

1. My team and I won the National Rounds at Phillip C. Jessup International Law Moot Court Competition 2013 in Universiti Malaya in February 2013.

2. My team and I went to Washington DC to represent our university and Malaysia at the International Round of Jessup 2013.

3. I finally got to experience NEW YORK CITY! I <3 ny="" p="">
4. As soon as I got back from the US, I was then elected to be the President of UiTM Mooting Club batch 2013/2014.

5. Went travelling, I think 2013 has been the year with me most travelling.  Can't really remember where I went though but among others were Kuching, Sarawak and Ho Chi Minh, Vietnam.

6. The Club was one of the most active clubs in the faculty. With three big events and some gatherings in between. Of course there were some ups and downs but that is normal.

7. Did my internship at Hafarizam Wan & Aisha Mubarak in Putrajaya and met with the best officemates ever! Miss them so much.

8. and finally, I GRADUATED with MY FIRST DEGREE! (Although results was out in 2014, I still consider this a part of 2013)

As said, 2013 has taught me alot about life, friendship, people, love, relationships, work, ethics, happiness, and many more. It has brought me closer to my family though most the times I was not home due to the hectic life I had in college. The best feeling is when you know that you have made both of your parents proud of your achievements, be it academics or extra-activities.

So, there you go. 2013 for me, in short.

Its 2014 now and I am fairly happy to start the new year because its a whole new experience. LLB, Here I come!

Goals for 2014

1. Kick LLB's ass!

2. Travel more (backpacking, proper or whatever types of travelling)

3. Kick LLB's ass (again!)

4. Be really successful at my final mooting competition in April.

5. Start learning how to make my own money (business or work)

6. Finally, lose some freaking weight! I am now so fat. ergh

There you go. 2014!

Lets go!

Love,
MARL!

Power Comes with Responsibility

I have been following Once Upon a Time religiously and all I can say is that I love that movie. One thing I learn from the movie is that 'Magic always comes with a price'. This is similar to what I am about to write about.

Power = Magic
Price = Responsibility

If you look at those two quotes; 'Power comes with responsibility' and 'Magic always comes with a price', they both have similar meaning. Both have a very similar definitions and that both have a very similar message. RESPONSIBILITY.

If you look at the second quote, you will see that whenever you do something you will be accountable for it. When you decide to act, the implications you have to bear. Same goes with the first quote where power is an act and upon acting you are accountable for your actions. You are entitled to decide whether or not to act and you are entitled to act accordingly and having done that you are responsible for your actions. Similar, isn't it?

Everyone wants power. Everyone wants magic. But not everyone is willing to bear the consequences or the duties behind them. They are not willing to be accountable for their actions. We will come across these kind of people in our lives and sometimes, we are one.

The thing about power and magic is that they are everyone's desire. Everyone wants to be in power and if possible have magic. That is a fact. No one would reject being in power unless he is someone who does not give a damn about living. But, before taking in the power, ask yourself are you willing to be responsible for all actions? and are you willing to carry extra work or burdens than everyone else? If you are not, then please, your time is not now. Maybe later.

Just one simple question before accepting the power

are you willing to be responsible and be accountable for all actions and doing more work than everyone else?

However, if you have answered 'No' to the question above, you must make sure that you really are unable to do it. If you are scared, there is in fact a reason for you to just try it out because you will never know your capability is because being scared and not prepared are two different stories. If you are scared, break that and try it. You'll never know. Maybe you will do great at it. But, if you think you are not prepared then get yourself prepared to be someone with power and is willing to carry those responsibilities.

p/s: I have no idea what I am blabbering about.

Love,
Marl

Disappointment

The funny thing about life is sometimes you have faith that everything will turn out well but it turned out to be otherwise and sometimes the wrong thing isn't really your fault and that you have tried all your best to get the end result done. It is frustrating when your hard work turned into rubbish at the end.

Well, I cannot really say that it is rubbish but I am disappointed by the end result. I really thought everything has turned out well but truth is, it is not. It is more disappointing when it is not something that you do but carelessness of some people. It really was not a big task. 

I consider myself to be very detailed. I check everything very detailed. Almost all assignments for class, I will be the last person who checked and submit the end result. So far, nothing has been done wrong, formatting at least. This is because I made sure that everything is in order and nothing extraordinary is present in the assignment. However, I have let this go TWICE and guess what...both of the times something just went really really wrong! 

It is disappointing especially when you know that you could have done that and if you did then nothing would go wrong but when you have given faith to another and something like this happen. I honestly have no idea how to nicely put what I feel into words right now. 

At the time I saw the end result, I felt like crying. I really was about to cry. But, taking into considerations the surroundings at the time, I kept myself cool. I was trying hard not to drop a tear. I am sure that this error will haunt me for a long time till I get over it. 

It is just disappointing!

I am disappointed.

Love,
Marl

Do You Really Feel Happy

Today, as I drove my car to get my brother from school I suddenly have some thought about something and one major question came to my mind

"AM I HAPPY NOW?"

and then I realised that I don't think I am happy right now.
I may be laughing around and being happy but the truth is
I don't think I feel happy right now.

I don't think I am happy right now.
Why is that?
What is that?
I have family who loves me to death
I have friends who care
I have friends who can make me laugh
I have friends who know what to say at the right time

So, why am I not happy?
Why?
This is some serious question to be answered.

For You

2013, the year full of hopes

New hopes, new dreams, new goals

Honestly, I have nothing new

I didn't have new hopes

I didn't have new dreams

Nor did I have new goals.

I am just me

The one who don't talk much

The awkward one

The one who cared too much

When you...

Its been long since I first cared

Its been years since I first cared

But of course, who am I for you to even notice

It happened many times

...and I feel like I am used to it

But sometimes my self-esteem just crushed bit-by-bit

Because you left me hanging to think 'Did I do something wrong?'

'Did I say something wrong?' 'Why did everyone do this to me?'

'Am I annoying?'

All sort of questions come to mind

You might not see it, people might not see it

My friends might not see it

My close friends might not see it

But, I know. I know my insecurities.

It just hurts

When you tried so hard

When you tried to help

When you tried to care

But, people just don't notice

It hurts when I tried

It hurts when I did

It hurts when you didn't even try

Try to say 'Thank you'

It hurts the most when I care but you don't

Don't even reply.

Love,

Marl

To The Owner of Honda Accord Living at SS7 Condo

I apologize for the sudden-brake

I apologize for the sudden-brake

I apologize for thinking that you are a road bully

I apologize for thinking so negatively about you

I apologize

I then realised that you did all that to let me know that my headlights were not ON!

again.. I apologize!

(I really do hope this message gets to you)

Sincerely,
The owner of the White Saga

Invisible

For years I've been living
Never have I ever had felt
Felt like I'm flying across
Across the sky, smiling

From short to long
I thought it was enough
From rough to soft
I thought it was enough

I'm passing by one-to-one
I'm standing side-by-side
I'm smiling softly, with hope
That I am noticed

The leader, I am
The friend, I am
The listener, I am
The lover, I am not

Questions keep bugging my mind
What is there that is left?
My physique?
or they are intimidated?

p/s: I am currently emotionally unstable. Don't mind all these~

My Last Night's Dream.

My Last Night’s Dream

It has been five years since we have known each other

We are friends, we are buddies, we are each other’s back

We have never knew that this would happen

But, it happened.

On 19^th July 2012

You invited all of your friends

To your old-shack home

Including your beloved girlfriend

We were laughing and giggling

We were all happy

You and I sat beside one another

Within all the happiness that’s happening at that moment, something just clicked.

Our eyes suddenly met

You were looking into my eyes and I was looking into your eyes

The laughter was still there but we know that something just happened

And it was something magical.

Firework sparks fly

The stars were glazing bright

The moon was beautifully-round

And our hearts just say “Hi”

No one realizes this was happening

But the devil in the shack noticed it all

She was your mom

You walked me to the door

We did not say a word

But inside, we were both smiling

I asked “What has just happened” just to break the ice

And you said “I think I’m in love”

The devil called your name

Asking you to serve the other guests

She walked towards me and said

“I know what’s happening. He has a girlfriend and it is best for you to just back-off”

It was not a surprised

I can feel my heart crumbling inside

He knew something was going on

He looked at me

My eyes start to tears

My heart was racing

My body starts paralyzing

And he came

He said “What did she say?”

I could not respond instead I ran off

He was standing with so many thoughts in his head

And his beloved girlfriend stood beside him knew something was up

Between you and I.

P/s: This really was my dream last night. I am not even kidding. This can be the most romantic thing ever or the saddest thing ever. 

Some people say that dreams come from somewhere either from the future or the past. What would this one be? Where is it from? The future or the past? 

Love,

Marl

Make Up Your Mind, Buddy!

They are all sorts of people you will meet in this world. They are bad ones, good ones, manipulative ones, opportunist ones etc. You will come across these type of people at least once in your life and that I can assure you.

Sometimes you are denying that you are surrounded by these people but the fact is, YOU ARE SURROUNDED by them. You just have to accept the fact. Sometimes, they are one of your close friends, sometimes they are one of your teamates, and sometimes they are even someone who you have trusted to be the most sincere amongst others. You just have to accept that there are the other side of that particular person.

Perhaps, the person is just someone who is so hungry of attention or it may be of some other reasons.

It is my utmost 'PANTANG' that when I have decided something I would have to stay true to my decision and keep my promise. There is NO turning back to my decision. That is why it is so crucial to THINK before you DECIDE. That is why people always say that you better think twice or even trice before you say something to other people. That is why people always say that you better be careful of what you will decide and you better be ready to face all consequences that will follow upon deciding.

When you say A, you are expected to do, act, keep you promises about A. You are not expected to act otherwise. You are NOT EXPECTED to act backwards that is to do whatever you DID before. You are not expected to take a step back! Look forward and look forward and go to that direction.

Do not act as though you are an innocent creature who knows nothing and comes back when NOBODY expects you to come back. It is very very frustrating to see the one person who I respect, once, is the person who walk backwards and not forward.

Just an advice, PLEASE MAKE UP YOUR MIND AND ONCE YOU HAVE, PLEASE STAY TRUE TO YOUR DECISION AND NEVER LOOK BACK! 

My Mom Says...

"Tak sabar nak tunggu Marlysa betunang"

in English

"I can't wait for Marlysa to get engaged"

p/s: and I am screwed!

What's With Your Arrogance?

There is ups and downs in life.

You are not always at the top and you will fall to the bottom of the 'food chain' eventually if not now maybe later. You will experience your downs somehow somewhere. The thing about life is that it will always tests the ones who are arrogant by giving them the goodness in life first before dragging them down the road to the most horrifying place where they will realise that they are not the best and there are people who are better than them.

I have not always understood people who are arrogant and snobbish. I see no point of being such due to the fact that you will never know what the other persons are capable of. They might be better than you in one if not all aspects in life. There must be something that they are better than you. Therefore, being arrogant and snobbish is not the way.

You will have to teach yourselves to the humble and down-to-earth most of the time. Yes, I did not say all the time because there are circumstances in life where you do have to act snobbish and arrogant. When? You will know when to use it when the time comes.

I have one thing that I am not in favour of that is person who is acting like they know everything but in fact they do not even understand what they are talking about. Never had the guts to ask. Never had the intention to learn and never had the urge to be intellectual. This is what we call, in Malay language, as Bodoh Sombong. 'Bodoh' is Stupid and 'sombong' is snobbish. It means someone who do not know anything but acts as though he knows everything and do not have the guts to ask questions. In addition to that, they are very very arrogant.

Another type of arrogant is when the person is having so much fun and joy flattering their titles to others. For example, he had just become an important person to a company and little he know about the actual fact on running a company, he showed-off to everyone about his role in the company, for example, a Managing Director. There is no need to show-off your title when you just got it.

Apart from that, when you are involved or about to get involved in a business or you are dealing with experienced persons, you, as the new kid, must be humble. You are not allowed (the rule) to talk BIG! You are not allowed to show your attitude as though you know everything about business. You are dealing with persons who have years of experience, a degree in business and an experienced accountant. You possess no bragging rights whatsoever.

I called these new people who are getting themselves involved in business as 'chicks which had just came out from hatched eggs'. You are THAT new. Therefore, you did not have the bragging rights. What you have is the game card to impress these people. Impress them, catch their intention, make business, make money and then bragging rights will come in. Even with all that, arrogance will not bring you far.

STOP being so arrogant and STOP being snobbish. STOP being the person who allegedly 'knows it all'. Just STOP! You are not bringing any good to yourself or other people. You are just wasting your time!

Love,
Marl

Get Ready to Pack

I would say this year is the year where I travel most. I've been to so many different places in one year and that is my first step in becoming the TRAVELER!

I've been to places which I have not imagined myself going. I've been to places where I have dreamed of going. I've been to places where I've been for so many times and I've been to places where taught me a lot about life.

I have said this in my many posts. I have repeated this a lot of times that I love travelling. Travelling is my one medium that keeps me sane. I am grateful that my family loves travelling as well and I could say that my parents trained me to be as such person. It all comes from how you were educated at home, right?

I am going off to another place tomorrow. Place where I have been to once and going again for the second time. Yes, I am excited but I know what to expect when I am there. I know how it is there and I know how is the people there. So, there should not be any hardship to adjust and adapt to the whole situation.

I would really like to go to someplace where I have never been to and I have no idea what to expect just like when I went to India. I did not have the experience being in India and I have no idea what to expect to happen there. So, I can just whack everything up. LOL. India has taught me a lot about life and I will never forget the experience. If God permits, I really want to go back to India to experience the life, culture, scenery of India. It was a priceless experience.

Apart from that,

My point for this post is in fact, I am not in the mood to pack my stuff. I was excited, I am excited but I am just not in the mood to do the packing and stuff. I have not even list down things to bring which is my normal routine every time I am travelling somewhere, oversea.

Going to have to get the mood now.

Love,
Marl

Why Is My Life-Graph Going Downwards?

As I read my previous posts, I realised that my English, previously, was better than my English now.

Why is this happening?

His name is Thomas McDonell

I just found out about him after watching the movie 'Prom' on Astro. 

His bad boy look and long, silky, shiny hair make him look Wuishhh~ 

LOL~ 

H.A.P.P.Y

Happiness is what people look forward to in life.
Happiness is what people are hungered for in life.
Happiness comes in and out of our lives.
Happiness comes in many ways.

You may gain happiness when you just fall in love
You may gain happiness when you achieved something in life.
You may gain happiness when people you love are happy.
You may gain happiness just by enjoying your life to the fullest.

It is said that happiness is sometimes cruel
because it gives us false hope
We thought that we are truly happy but the truth is..it's just a lie
We thought that happiness would come in our way but it never came.

Once we thought that we are happy
Once we thought that we have it all
Once we thought that love is there
Suddenly, it all disappear

How can that be?
What had just happened?

We laugh, we smile, we giggle, and we cry
for happiness
The happiest thing in life is when we are ourselves happy in and out.

Love,
Marl
(sounds like its incomplete. I apologize)

English

I have never been excellent in language

I have never been excellent in English nor in Malay

I have never been good in structuring sentences

I have never been good in grammar

...and without more practice, it just makes my English worse than EVER!

Moral of the story: I have to start writing again. More writing and more writing! 

As You Get Older, These Questions Will Haunt You Down.

21 years old

This is the age where the questions will start haunting you down

This is the age where everyone will ask you the same questions

If you are in the same situation as I am right now, you will know what type of questions are FAQ.

I, personally, am uncomfortable with the questions

They make me question myself

They make me question the qualities which I might not have

They make me question my own personal appearance

They make me INSECURE

21 years old

The year where others have their past experiences

The year where others have their 2nd or 3rd partner

The year where I get more and more questions

Honestly, the questions do not so much influence my eagerness to have one partner but they make me question more about myself

the word INSECURE comes to play

the word SELF-CONFIDENCE comes into the picture

the word NOT GOOD appears

When I am back in my hometown, the first question asked by the elderly is

'Do you have a boyfriend? No? Why haven't you have one?'

As I said, these questions do not make me want a boyfriend more but they affect my inner-self  as I will start to question my self. Due to this, my SELF-CONFIDENCE sheds day by day

The question WHY? WHY? WHY? comes into my mind.

It gets to me and it has knocked me down once.

I need to stand up straight again and held my head high once more and just hope for the best in life.

ALLAH KNOWS BEST!

Love,
Marl